Penalty!

I never mention it here.. but actually last week I have a major shut down of myself..

My mood swing very bad.. I'm homesick and I hate everything...

What happen then...

I just completely hate study and hate anything that related to it..

1. So, as a quiz coming for VHDL subject.. I dont study at all.. I keep trying to study but all I can do is stare at books.. So, on the quiz, I rely 100% on my understanding in class..

2. I also don't do homework very well.. As homework dateline nearer.. I just do whatever I can without giving any extra effort for the difficult one.. I just let go and don't care..

3. I even forget to check DSP website and did not alert that there is homework that need to be submitted.. I just realize it when I saw somebody submit something.. I like.. "What's that?" but I have friends who help me on this.. thanks god!

Ok.. that's three things for the three subjects..

I do try to help myself.. I eat a lot last week.. hopefully it help me. but it's doesn't.. I chats to friends.. it lift my mood for a while but only for a while.. I go out.. (Obama, Halloween, walmart) yes, it help a little... And I also sleep a lot.. I sleep around 12 hours a day these day and still feel sleepy..

So the penalty..

1. I got the VHDL quiz result today.. The subject that I always excellent.. I just got the average mark of the whole class (which is still surprise me.. I thought I'll fail for sure)

2. Somehow.. the analog prof keep giving us chances.. So, she keep postpone the homework due.. So, somehow I have to start thinking on her difficult questions.. Cannot ignore it anymore..

3. DSP.. well, what a friends for right? But I have a very hardtime to understand a simple lab problem which I think my TA will be dissapointed in me.. huhuhu..

So, what now???

I feel better now.. A little.. I begin to cook again (one of my drawback is I just cook like a simple crazy food.. everyday makan nasi+kicap+telur).. I also gain back the interest on my study... (but still not as before)

Somehow.. my sleep patern change.. I sleep more these days.. Kul 10.30 dah ngantok (which is not good for my study)..

Kiranya.. I have "something" like deppression or a very homesick sindrom (call home just don't help.. I need to be home and detoxinizing myself like I always did when I'm working.. need to refresh myself just by balik kampung)

BUT.. I know I should not do that again.. As some of you know.. people can read me like a book.. So, it is noticable.. even my vhdl TA ask me if I'm feeling well or not.. So.. right now.. I have to heal myself.. Anyway, It's better now.. It just I'm easily get headache these days...

Chaiyok-2...